- Bio: Reluctant protagonist. Professional tech support, emotional support animal for three supernatural women. Has a thing for grilled cheese, low-stakes gaming, and not dying.
- Status: Confused, and definitely mortal. Possibly magical bait?
- Interests: Overthinking, potato skins, niche anime, flannel, survival.
- Fun Fact: Once took out a soul-eating monster with a kiss and a sarcastic comment. Still single.
Ellyllon (Elly): @IHavePixieProblems
- Bio: Chaotic fae with the emotional restraint of a golden retriever. Master of subtle sabotage and late-night cuddles that mean nothing, obviously.
- Status: Best friend. Secretly in love. Would rather set the world on fire than admit it.
- Calls me: Daniel
- Red Flags: Has hacked your calendar, and probably your thermostat, too.
- Fun Fact: Would absolutely kiss him first… but only if he deserved it.
Euryale (Euri): @StoneColdGoddessEury
- Bio: Literal Gorgon. Figurative goddess. Beautiful enough to ruin traffic patterns. Finds Daniel’s immunity fascinating and his hoodie collection appalling.
- Status: Emotionally- repressed, tall girl with murder skills. May flirt via high-stakes threats.
- Calls me: Dan
- Red Flags: Has a contingency plan to kill you just in case and updates it weekly. Once turned a date into a power play and still calls it "efficient flirting."
- Fun Fact: Her closet costs more than Daniel’s apartment. Her eyes might kill you. She still kinda wants to hold hands. Maybe.
Lilith (Lily): @HotAndDraining
- Bio: Seductive disaster with a gooey emotional core and an unfortunate need to feed on life energy. Can’t decide if she wants to kiss you or steal your soul. Possibly both.
- Status: Flirts like a pro. Feeds like a vampire. Needs a nap.
- Calls me: Danny
- Red Flags: Will flirt with you mid-apocalypse, then ghost you emotionally for a week. Keeps score in arguments and in bed. Might seduce you and your enemies for fun.
- Fun Fact: Once got Daniel to hold her hand without draining his essence. Cried a little. Blamed it on allergies.
Zorka: @MeatAtMidnightRun
If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
- Bio: 20-something with a hair problem and the annoying habit of changing into a half-monster for several days a month.
- Status: Looking for a good hair removal cream.
- Calls me: Mercer
- Red Flags: Will eat the food off of your plate. Might also chase a stick or ball on command. Treats broken bones like optional accessories. Laughs at her own injuries. May or may not have chewed through handcuffs once.
- Fun Fact: Has been banned from nearly all dog parks in the tri-county area.
Jade: @QueenOfDumplingTown
- Bio: Grandma energy on the surface, eldritch loan-shark underneath. Runs the city’s supernatural favor economy like a stock market with extra knives.
- Status: Very much alive and somehow always in charge.
- Calls me: Anything she wants (condescendingly and affectionately even)
- Red Flags: Never accepts “no” as an answer. Probably has a ledger with everyone’s expiration date in it. Smiles like she’s already collected interest.
- Fun Fact: Brings dumplings when she shows up with bad news. They’re always really good dumplings, which makes it worse.
Sélis: @FiveFacesAtOnce
- Bio: Multiplicity made flesh. Exists in overlapping voices and faces, a walking collage of everyone she’s ever touched. Disorienting, unnerving, and sometimes… weirdly kind.
- Status: Still split, still functioning. Together but separate. How does that work?
- Calls me: Mercer, but each syllable sounds like it’s being borrowed from different mouths.
- Red Flags: Might kiss you just to see what happens. Boundaries are more like vague guidelines. Sometimes forgets which of her faces is speaking.
- Fun Fact: Once carried on a three-way argument with herself. Lost, won, and sulked all at the same time.
TinCan: [No Known Social Media Presence]
- Bio: Local alley prophet. Shopping cart full of conspiracy clippings, cough syrup, and things I don’t want to identify. Thinks everything’s connected. Sometimes he’s right.
- Status: Breathing, raving, and somehow indispensable.
- Calls me: Mercer or any number of random honorifics, often followed by a theory about how the pigeons are government drones.
- Red Flags: Frequently intoxicated on substances that may not legally qualify as “food.” Knows things he shouldn’t. Sleeps outdoors by choice.
- Fun Fact: Once traded me a tin-foil hat that really did block a Collector tag. I don’t like that it worked.