A week passed. Another family day arrived.

  Kasia’s mood hung over her like a storm cloud the entire week. When her Uncle Ren inquired about it over breakfast that morning, Kasia hesitated, then admitted to having had a fight with Isaak. Her father and Uncle Nathan let out a cheer, and even Ren struggled to hide his delight at the news.

  Kasia glared at all of them, overturned the bowl of fruit on the table in front of her and stalked out of the room.

  The following day, when Janine and Andrew had returned from visiting Andrew’s family’s farm on their family day, Kasia told them what had happened.

  “I think Isaak and I might be done. We had a fight and… I just don’t know.”

  Her friends looked at her, stunned.

  "What was it about?" Janine asked gently.

  Kasia sighed, her heart aching in her chest, "He was upset because I hadn't been coming to see him as often since Ivar died. I told him training increased and I needed the rest…and that I had to take my training seriously because the knights are all I'll have left when he leaves… But he became angry with me and said, 'Well I’m still here!' like it's some grand fucking gesture that he's planning to break my heart later instead of now! I told him if he promised to stay, that if he could just tell me he wanted to be with me like I want to be with him, that’s all I would need...but he couldn’t even give me that much.” Kasia's shoulders slumped miserably.

  Janine gently touched Kasia's shoulder. "I’m sorry, Kasia."

  "He can't even tell me he cares about me, but he wants me to throw everything away to keep him entertained?! I'm so fucking in love with him and he can't even say it back–but the Creators forbid I hold anything back from him!" Kasia buried her face in her hands, unable to stop her tears. Her heart felt like it was twisting itself in half in her chest.

  Everyone had warned her about getting attached. Kasia had promised to be careful. She had lied to them and, most damning, she had lied to herself.

  Janine made a soft sound, rubbing Kasia’s arm gently, "I don't know with certainty, but I've seen the way he looks at you. Especially when you're not looking back. He looks at you like you're the only thing he's ever wanted."

  Kasia barked a bitter laugh, "This is Isaak we're talking about? My Isaak? The guy that told me he travels from place to place collecting conquests and he'd like me to be one of them? That Isaak?"

  "I don't know, I wasn't there. I want you to protect yourself, Kasia, but I like Isaak.” Janine shrugged.

  “For someone his age, he is a lot of fun; But he's also kind of broken.” Andrew interjected. “He's always there, waiting for us, like he doesn’t have anything else in his life outside of finding entertainment. I don't want to tell you what to do, but maybe it’s a good thing. You deserve someone who wants to build a life with you…not just drift through it."

  Andrew’s words hurt, but he was trying to help. Was she an idiot for holding on? Hadn’t this relationship always been doomed from the start? She felt so stupid. She hadn’t anticipated falling in love– believed herself able to command her heart with the same discipline she used to force her body past its limits in the sparring ring.

  She spent the rest of the week stewing over what she should do.

  On Thursday night, she visited her mother’s grave. She told her mother what had happened between her and Isaak, and about the war inside her heart. She asked for advice and waited patiently beside the cold stone statue carved in the likeness of the Lady of Light. Which is to say the likeness of a beautiful woman, since no one actually knew what the Creatress looked like. Her mother’s grave did not reply, but it listened to her and held her confessions close.

  Kasia liked to imagine all of her conversations as tiny balls of energy, collecting inside the grave, and that her mother could feel and hear them wherever she was in the Creator’s paradise; when she died, she would find out her mother had listened to every word and they would start speaking to each other as though contributing a conversation.

  After an interminable week, Kasia awoke on another rest day. She had not snuck out to visit Isaak once. Today would mark two weeks since she had seen the woodsman.

  Oddly enough, the only silver lining during this storm of emotions had been the nights she spent training with Harold. There was a fragile peace between them, and Kasia found she liked it. She never told Janine and Andrew about what had happened between her and Harold, nor did she think she ever would. It felt too private. When they were in the lesson rooms or sparring ring together, they let their walls down…and so what happened in the training room stayed there, just between them.

  Kasia knew Harold must have felt the same, because if he had told any of the other initiates about their kiss, Louie would have crowed and mocked her for it relentlessly.

  Laying in her bed, thoughts brewing like a storm, Kasia decided that she would speak to Isaak. She needed to know if things were really over between them. She needed certainty, so she resolved herself to go to the inn. This time, she asked Janine and Andrew not to come with her.

  Wojciek commented on this as he walked her down to the inn.

  “Isaak and I need to have a talk… I didn’t want any distractions.” Kasia replied stiffly, hoping that her clipped tone would deter Wojciek from asking any further questions.

  "Oh? Has he upset you?" Wojciek asked, making no effort to hide that he was trying to pry into her relationship. "Still, surprised that you'd leave those two behind for anything. You love to follow them like a lost puppy."

  Kasia’s shoulders stiffened. He wasn’t wrong, but it hurt. “Pierdol si?, Wojciek.” (fuck you) she hissed through clenched teeth.

  "On our honeymoon, my love." He flashed a wicked grin at her, seeming to revel in her fury.

  Kasia made a disgusted noise in her throat and shook her head, refusing to look at him. It was strange and unsettling to hear him call her my love. He didn’t love her. And hearing the words on his lips, such a blatant lie, made her stomach twist in knots.

  “You really have no idea how to woo a woman, Wojciek.” she grunted.

  Kasia and Wojciek arrived at the inn. Kasia immediately searched the room for Sondra. When she spotted the woman, Kasia practically ran to her. “Is he–”

  The words caught in her throat. What if he had left? What if that had been the last time she ever saw him? “-has he left?” She prayed to the creators that Sondra would understand what she meant without her having to elaborate. Saying more would make all the emotions inside of her come spilling out and she wouldn’t be able to stop them.

  "I don't think so. I haven’t seen him at all this week, but I still take food to his room." Sondra replied kindly.

  A strangled whimper escaped Kasia’s throat. He hadn’t left yet.

  “Thank you.” she whispered hoarsely to Sondra.

  She rushed up the stairs and opened the door to his room. It was empty. The bed appeared as though it hadn’t been slept in. Kasia walked over to it, running her fingers along the coverlet as tears dribbled down her cheeks. She sank onto the bed and just stared at the wall, her eyes vacant, her heart an empty shell whose inhabitant had been scooped out.

  "I guess that he didn't care to say goodbye." Wojciek smiled as he slowly walked into the room.

  He opened one of the drawers of the cabinet lazily, "My, he didn't care at all." There were folded shirts inside, one a gift from Kasia.

  "Please get out, Wojciek." Kasia kept her voice as level as she could, but her body was trembling as the threads of her self control frayed.

  "Why? There's nothing for you here. Come home with me."

  "I said get out! You damned vulture! Can you not see that I am in pain? Go! And leave me be!" She screamed at him, hands balled into fists as she resisted the urge to launch herself at him and claw his face off until he gave her peace.

  "I think that it would be best if you waited downstairs." Sondra had quietly followed them upstairs, likely to protect Kasia from being left alone with Wojciek, for which Kasia was grateful. "Come with me, Knight Captain."

  Wojciek grunted in disapproval but followed the inn's matriarch out of the room. The door was quietly pulled shut behind them.

  Relief flooded through Kasia, along with a fresh wave of grief. She rolled onto her side, curling into herself, and cried.

  She ended up falling asleep, exhausted from her grief. When she woke, she rubbed the tear stains from her face. The light streaming in from the window told her she couldn’t have been out for more than an hour or two. She straightened out the wrinkled coverlet and went back down to the main room of the inn. She found Sondra first.

  “Thank you for dragging Wojciek out of there, and letting me borrow the room for a couple hours.” she forced her face into as pleasant of an expression as she could muster. “You’re so kind to me, Sondra.” She hugged the matron tightly.

  Affection radiated from Sondra's face. "You're like a daughter to me. Not that I could ever replace your dear Mamuska.” She reached up and cupped Kasia’s cheek, “Now, tell me: Is everything alright? Why are you upset today?"

  Kasia shook her head limply. “Isaak and I had a fight. Now he’s gone.”

  "He's gone?" Sondra’s brow furrowed in surprise.

  Kasia nodded. She had no more room for grief so it did not hurt to say it again. She was too numb to care. “The room was empty, the bed had not been slept in. He’s gone.”

  "That surprises me."

  Oh look– there is still a bit of room for hurt. Kasia thought glibly. “Thank you Sondra. Have a pleasant day. I need to be… anywhere but here.” She took a shuddering breath and left the inn, not caring if Wojciek saw that she was leaving or not.

  "Wait!" Sondra called out. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you…"

  Kasia looked back with a pained smile, “You didn’t.”

  She had originally been planning to go straight back to her room to avoid having to speak to anyone else, but the sun was high in the sky and the smell of salt seemed to pull her toward the coast.

  Fifteen minutes later, she found herself a nice warm rock that had been heated by the noon sun and leaned against it. She pulled off her boots and wriggled her toes in the sand, then closed her eyes and breathed out a sigh as the sound of the crashing waves and crying gulls soothed her.

  "You need to stop sneaking off." Wojciek had finally caught up with her. "I'm going to think that you're trying to lose me."

  “I made no secret of leaving. It’s your job to watch me, not the other way around.” Kasia replied coolly, never opening her eyes.

  He sat down beside her. "You're better off without him."

  “If you do not speak, you may stay.” she added in a clipped tone.

  "Fine."

  They sat there in peaceful silence for several hours, the waves and salty smell of the sea helping Kasia pull herself back together. At last she opened her eyes and turned her head to Wojciek, “I’m ready to go back now.”

  "Alright. Let's go home."

  Walking slowly back to the castle, Wojciek spoke, "Perhaps now you realize that you are meant to be my wife?" He reached out and brushed her hand with his fingertips, "You and I belong as one."

  Kasia looked up at Wojciek with an expression that was a mixture of pain and fury. “Will you stop?! I did not want to be your wife before Isaak and I do not want to be your wife now! I am sorry that I cannot return your affections. Life would be so much easier if I could, but I feel nothing toward you! Just… let me go.” Emotional exhaustion drained the fury out of her as quickly as it had begun. Her shoulders sank as she kept walking back toward the castle.

  Wojciek’s expression was furious, but he held his tongue, praise the creators.

  "We've been looking everywhere for you." Andrew slipped next to her in the cantina. "You look like shit. I take it that your conversation with Isaak didn't go over well?"

  Kasia took her time chewing her stewed beets before answering. “He is gone.” The shortness in her tone told Janine and Andrew that it was something she did not want to talk about.

  "You didn't find him?" Andrew asked in surprise.

  Kasia glared at him. Must he pour salt in her wounds?

  "He's at the cave!" Janine cried out.

  Kasia choked on her beets, “WHAT?!”

  "We went there to, you know. And we found him there, asleep." Andrew replied as he slapped her back. "So we left assuming that you'd find him and want to be alone. It's a little late now. I don't know if they'll let you out of the castle."

  Kasia let out a peal of manic laughter that drew several alarmed looks from around the Cantina. She continued to giggle hysterically for several more minutes.

  "Kasia, honey, I am this close to strapping you to your bed so you can't hurt yourself. You're scaring me." Janine looked at her with worried brown eyes.

  "Oh no, it's just funny, you know? Because I went to the inn and his bed hadn't been slept in…and I cried in it for hours, because he was gone. I even went to the fucking beach – sat there all day and apparently he was just snoozing in the cave nearby?" Another trill of laughter bubbled from her throat.

  Janine raised her palm threateningly, "This hurts me more than it hurts you-" her voice quavered as she went to slap Kasia.

  Kasia caught her friend's wrist, still chuckling. "I think I'll pass, but I appreciate that you care."

  Janine's expression softened and she put an arm around Kasia. "So what are you going to do?"

  Kasia sighed, "Go talk to him. I still need to know. And today has already been ruined, so it's not like anything he can say will make it worse."

  "That's the spirit, you cheerful fuck!" Andrew's lips twitched in amusement.

  Isaak's POV

  It was her smell that roused him. That perfect undefinable perfume that was unique to her.

  But he ignored it. It was probably his mind tormenting him again. He had thought he'd smelled her earlier today, too, but she never appeared.

  Then he heard the sounds of climbing, and a small figure crested the wall of the cave.

  His heart stopped beating in his chest.

  "I went to the inn today…your bed hadn't been slept in. I thought…" she paused to catch her breath. "I thought that you lied. That you had left without saying goodbye."

  She stood still at the mouth of the cave watching him, her expression wary.

  There was no warmth within the cave. No fire burned within, but her presence felt like the sun rising in the sky.

  "I keep my promises, little one." His pride prevented him from running to her and begging her to never leave his side again.

  The moment that she had left him had pierced him deeper and harder than any weapon ever had. He had left that instant and retreated to the cave. Her cave. Even now the pain that she had caused him throbbed. Curse this woman. I wanted to never love again.

  Kasia nodded slowly, still refusing to draw closer. "I…" her voice trailed off. She looked like a startled doe, ready to bolt.

  She couldn't find the words, so he spoke instead, "I didn't think that you'd want to see me after our fight. I didn't think that you'd go to the inn. So I came here to ambush you." His voice felt scratchy and raw. "But you weren't with Andrew and Janine when they came… I thought that I'd never see you again... That you'd want me to leave."

  He had waited here in a place he knew she would return to eventually to force her to talk to him.

  Kasia's face bloomed with an expression of surprise and hope, "Of course I don’t want you to leave, foolish man! I’ve never wanted that." Her voice was husky and choked with emotion.

  She took a few tentative steps forward, then fell on her knees before him looking up at him with eyes full of hurt and, that which he both craved and feared from her: love.

  He was unsure what to say next. He couldn't remember the last time that he had cared enough for someone to apologize. "I missed you."

  “I missed you too.” Kasia whispered back, finally crawling close enough to touch. She shyly pushed apart his legs, and he opened them invitingly, holding out his arms to welcome her. She moved to sit between his thighs, laying her head on his chest.

  Kasia bit her lip, hesitating before she spoke, “I want to explain something. I think… I think maybe it will better help you understand why… well, why the thought of you leaving makes me so emotional…”

  Kasia blew a puff of air to move the hair that had fallen into her eyes out of her face, “Everyone leaves.” her voice broke off as whatever emotion she was feeling seemed to clog her throat. She stared at his chest, unable to meet his eyes.

  He pulled her more tightly to him, cupping the side of her head protectively. Possessively.

  Finally she resumed, “It started when I was five, when mama died. Then Knight Hunter Nikodem, who always brought me back sweets from the furthest corners of the world when he would return from missions; He was lost to a leshen. Then it was the four brothers Stainislaw, Leon, Jakub, and Ignacy. They used to throw me back and forth between them in a game of keep away. Jakub died first, in a shipwreck. Then Stainislaw and Leon were eaten by trolls…there wasn’t even enough left to bury. Ignacy…he just walked into the woods one day and never came back. And, most recently, Ivar, who could always make me laugh. Those aren’t the only hunters who have died, but they were the ones I considered friends.”

  The wayward lock of hair fell in her face once more and Kasia irritably tucked it behind her ear. Isaak was silent, watching her. Giving her room to speak.

  “So death is one way that they leave… then there’s the other kind of leaving. It used to be my Tatu? and Wujeks, before they were the Lord Commander and Generals. After Matka died, Tatu? feared to ever leave my side again, but my Wujeks still went on missions for months at a time. Then my eldest brother Kornosz passed his rites and left to see the world and slay monsters and, ‘Become a greater hunter than our Ojciec ever was!’,” Kasia chuckled sadly, “His words, not mine. Jacek passed his rites and left for France when I was twelve. Then it was just Tatu?, Imka, and I.

  “One day a handsome merchant prince came to visit, hoping to expand his market here in Poland. He took one look at Imka and that was it. They were married a month later. She left for Italy five years ago.” Kasia rubbed away her tears angrily.

  “Andrew and Janine will leave eventually. I know they think that they won’t, but once Andrew takes out his rites this year or next, they’ll be married and have children of their own…” Kasia shook her head. “Wojciek wants to marry me and leave me here alone so he can be the hero. All the knights want this— a girl waiting for them to come home. But they never think about what it’s like to be the one left behind.” Kasia’s breathing grew ragged, her emotions building like the tide.

  “So I came up with a plan– I would be the one to leave. I would become a knight. I would travel the world slaying monsters and meeting new people. And I would always be moving. I wouldn’t be the one left behind any longer.” She covered her face with her hands, weeping softly.

  After a few minutes, she steadied her breathing and continued, “And then you showed up. And you want to leave. But then you stay, and I started to hope that you would never leave… And that’s why…that’s why I wanted you to promise to marry me someday, because then I would know that you would never leave me behind.”

  Kasia’s body shook in his arms. “You were married before…and you lost her. Of course you never want to marry again…I… I just needed you to understand why it matters so much to me.” Kasia buried her face against his chest, and Isaak continued to stroke her hair.

  “You keep yourself very guarded.” He lied . She thought she did, but she wore every emotion and desire plainly on her face without ever realizing it. Saying that would likely start another fight, though, so he allowed her to believe she was stone, “I understand. I always have as well.” His face was soft and tender. “I’m a monster, remember?”

  Kasia sniffled, looking up at him, her expression so soft and vulnerable it flooded him with instincts to carry her off and protect her, "Why do you keep saying that? Does that mean I'm a monster for wanting someone who can't leave me?"

  “A most horrific one.” He said playfully. “I must let the hunters know!”

  Kasia rolled her eyes, “If that’s your definition of a monster, you truly have never met one. I mean, technically, I haven’t either because we aren’t allowed on any hunts until we’ve passed our rites, but I’ve dissected a few, so…close enough.”

  “Not all monsters have fangs and are covered in fur, little girl.” Isaak playfully chided her before he pulled her into a kiss.

  He saw her eyes flash when he called her little girl, knowing how she would rage against such a label. He wanted it, her fire. He loved seeing her burn. But she surprised him, she kissed him back, instead. And that was even better, for she burned for him.

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  "By the Creators! I missed you so much!" And she continued to cry as she kissed him over and over.

  “Leave them out of this,” Wilkas teased through her kisses, “I only want to hear my name on your lips.”

  She stayed in his arms all night long, and when the dawn came, he cursed the sun for rising.

  Why did I have to fall in love? He thought to himself as she left. He hadn't slept the entire night choosing, instead, to memorize the feel of her in his arms while he listened to the waves below.

  Laying back down, he finally went to sleep. He had all day to return to the inn.

  You may yet regret making me love you, for you'll never leave my side again, huntress.

  The next day, Kasia went to the Lord Commander’s private rooms to have breakfast with her father and Uncles. During their meal they told her that they would be unable to spend the day with her as they were busy with preparations for the full moon, which was fast approaching.

  Kasia had to hide her delight at the fact that she would be able to spend the entire day with Isaak.

  She arrived at the cave and climbed up the cliffside with practiced efficiency. She grinned when she saw Isaak, having only left him hours ago.

  “Hello, my love. Do you plan to live here now or will you move back to the inn?”

  "That would be rude. This cave doesn't belong to me. I was just about to leave for the inn. I wasn't expecting you until tonight."

  Kasia kissed him tenderly. She was still recovering from the belief that she had lost him forever. “I wasn’t either, but my Tatu? and Wujeks are busy preparing for the full moon. They plan to hunt the monster personally this time.”

  Isaak’s eyes twinkled with delight. “I would love to see that. I thought that they were old farts that only sent the young ones out.”

  Kasia’s eyes widened in surprise, “Not at all. They may be slightly past their prime, but they are still the three greatest monster slayers in all the land.”

  "So I've heard. For years I've heard the bards sing of their adventures."

  Kasia smiled, pleased. She was more than a little proud of her father and uncles.

  “Well I’ve already eaten, but I am happy to watch you enjoy breakfast. Shall we go to Sondra's inn?”

  Isaak agreed and, after climbing down from the cliffs, they walked to the inn, hand in hand.

  When they arrived, they of course looked for Sondra. Isaak to order breakfast and Kasia to… well, apologize for how she left things the previous day.

  "Apologize?" Sondra looked stunned. "Whatever for?"

  “I…You were trying to comfort me and I brushed you off.”

  "It's okay, dear. Is everything better? Where did you find him?"

  Kasia laughed softly, "He was hiding in the cave Janine, Andrew, and I have been playing in since we were children."

  Sondra laughed, “Knowing you'd go there eventually.” She shook her head, amused. “You're good for him, Kasia. I'm glad you two worked things out.”

  “Me too.”

  After Isaak placed his food order, he and Kasia headed straight upstairs. It wasn't long before they were naked beneath the covers of his bed, desperate to feel one another after so long apart.

  "What is your favorite food?" Kasia asked him as he wolfed down his fourth scone. Sondra had stopped by and delivered a tray full of warm homemade food. Her husband, Gregosz, really was an amazing cook.

  "I really enjoy red meat. Venison, lamb, pork, beef. It's hard to displease me with meat." He replied and his smile grew more feral. "Have you ever eaten the heart?"

  Kasia wrinkled her nose, "I've tried heart, but it's far too tough for my liking." She chuckled softly, "It's a good thing you're such a skilled hunter. Most folk don't get to enjoy meat that often. Hmm… we still have to take that hunting trip sometime."

  Kasia lay on her stomach, kicking her legs in the air idly. "Not a fan of chicken or rabbit, then?"

  "You asked me what my favorite food was. So I must hate everything else?" He gave her a wicked smile, "And that doesn't even include my favorite thing to eat."

  Kasia smacked his leg then laughed, "You scoundrel!" Her lips twitched but she was spreading her legs for him. "I was thinking of cooking for you sometime, but it would seem that I already have your favorite right here…"

  Isaak gave her a wicked grin and pushed her legs back together. "In that case, I'd love to sample something that you prepared."

  Kasia's jaw fell open in mock outrage, "You rude man! Now I don't know if you deserve it!"

  "You adore my rudeness." His smile was pure arrogance, "It's fun! Besides, I know how much you love to show off your skills."

  Kasia’s eyes flickered with mischief and she spread her legs once more. “True… very true. I suppose then you shall have to watch me enjoy what you did not care to...” She slid her hand down her belly, staring Isaak straight in the eyes as she did so. Under any other circumstances, she would have been too ashamed to be so blatant, but the way Isaak looked at her– the way he had always looked at her, she felt like the most desirable creature in the world.

  “Such a cruel temptress…” Isaak’s voice was rough as he rose forward, and pinned her hand in place against her lower abdomen. They stared each other down, neither one blinking, and then he guided her hand lower.

  He tormented her with pleasure until her limbs felt like jelly. She couldn't have moved even if she'd wanted to. "You…are a monster…" she panted, "that was…good, but…too intense…"

  "Yes, I am." He let out a pleased growl as he returned to kissing her.

  She whimpered, overcome with sensations, melting into his kiss. Her emerald eyes sparkled with warmth as she gazed up at him. "How I ever found the strength to walk away from you, I'll never know. Forgive me."

  "I admire your strength." He said, his voice still thick with desire. "But you won't do that again."

  "No," she hummed against his lips, "I won't. I've made my choice. I choose you."

  They pleasured each other with soft caresses and rough embraces for a couple hours, then left the inn to go into the forest to enjoy a game of hide and seek.

  They spent the rest of the day in joyful play together and Kasia's heart felt as light as air. Fuck tomorrow. It would come whether she worried about it or not.

  When the sun set, she returned to the castle, wanting to be well rested for training in the morning. Before she left, she promised she would make more time to see Isaak during the week.

  As she slipped out of the secret passage, behind a tapestry, an arm grabbed Kasia roughly.

  “Where have you been?!” Wojciek stared at her with anger—and some other emotion Kasia couldn’t identify. He pulled and twisted her arm to force her to face him.

  Kasia yelped at Wojciek’s rough handling of her. “Nowhere. I went for a run… I needed to clear my head.” she yanked her arm from his grip. “What are you so upset about?”

  “Me? Why should I be upset?” He replied aggressively, releasing her at last.

  “Well you practically ripped my arm out of my socket,” Kasia rubbed her arm where he had grabbed it, “So I’m assuming you’re upset about something.”

  “Well, you’re sneaking out of the castle. Which already is against the expectations of an initiate. But there is also a curfew. Do you think that being the Lord Commander’s daughter exempts you from the rules?”

  “I-no. I just… I needed to get out of the castle. I needed to clear my head. These restrictions have been going on for months… I’m stir crazy. Besides, the werewolf only attacks on the full moon and that’s a week away. It’s silly to have these restrictions in place all month long!”

  “That’s not for you to decide, initiate.” He glared at her, eyes roving over her face, then her body. “And that’s not even counting your constant attempts to escape supervision on your rest days. Nor the many times I’ve watched you return in the morning after sneaking off to visit your lover at night! You poor little maiden. Oh, wait, that’s not true now is it? I’m looking forward to seeing you punished by your Ojciec. You spoiled brat. Finally he’ll see that you're not huntress material.” He snatched her wrist and began dragging her toward the war room.

  Kasia blanched, her mouth falling open in silent horror. Was he implying that…? He was… Wojciek thought she had slept with Isaak! And, well, the truth of the matter wasn’t very far off. Not that it mattered. All that mattered was how it looked. Would her father kick her out of the knights for this? She didn’t know.

  Her heart beat like a rabbit in her chest “Please don’t!” Kasia begged Wojciek. “I’ll follow the rules, I promise! Please don’t tell him!”

  Wojciek stopped suddenly, his hand still around her wrist. "That's the big fear, isn't it?"

  He spun her to look at him. "Disappointing dear old Tatu?…Would you rather that I punish you? You could remain Tatu? perfect little girl. With Imka off and married, your brothers in England and France, you're all that he has."

  “Yes!” Kasia choked, stepping closer to Wojciek, eyes gazing up pleadingly into his pale green ones. “Please. Punish me instead.”

  Wojciek grabbed Kasia roughly by the chin, his temper seemingly assuaged. "As you wish. Come with me. We'll discuss your terms."

  Wojciek pulled her through corridors that were rarely used until they came to a room at the end of a hallway.

  "Inside!" He shoved her in and followed.

  Kasia trembled slightly. This was not where she had expected him to take her. Was this his room? As the Knight Captain, Wojciek got his choice of rooms in the castle, instead of one in the barracks, as did all members of her father’s council. His was one far secluded from the rest. Kasia found that a little odd.

  She looked around curiously. It smelled like him… Did he want her to scrub his floors? Clean the ash from his fireplace? Do his laundry?

  She turned back to face Wojciek. “Okay…so what do you want me to do?”

  Wojciek locked the door and pushed her up against the wall. Alarm bells began clanging loudly in her head

  “Stay.” He ordered her firmly. When he was satisfied that she wouldn't move, he went and sat on the bed, watching her.

  “Remove your clothing. All of it. I want to see you.”

  Kasia opened her mouth to protest but he held his hand up to cut her off. “I will not touch you. I wish to look.”

  She hesitated, her face burning. This was his idea of a punishment?! To debase her? But… it was just looking… She had been naked in front of her friends, her siblings, and Isaak. Knights were nude in front of each other all the time, largely because the men’s barracks were crowded and privacy was a luxury.

  But this was different… this was… he wanted to look at her. Likely so that he could picture her while he— NO! She didn’t want to think about him doing that. But… It was a small price to pay to make him keep her secret, a secret that could get her thrown out of the knights.

  With fumbling fingers she stripped off her clothes slowly. Not because she wanted to be sensual, but because the act felt so repugnant it was difficult to force herself to move.

  Why was it so easy to be naked with Isaak? When she was with him it felt right, safe, and natural. This felt cold and…wrong. Like she was one of Nathan’s cadavers laying on the autopsy table, waiting to be dissected. And that was definitely how it felt like Wojciek was looking at her– like he was dissecting her with his eyes.

  She fought against her tears. She would not let him see how badly he had gotten to her. She would not be weak in front of him.

  Once she stood completely bare, she held her hands out, turned in a circle, then faced forward once more.

  “Have I fulfilled your punishment?” she hissed.

  Wojciek's eyes were glued to her. They trailed languidly across her body. He wore the smile of a victor. “You are exquisite. That is good for now, yes. You may dress.”

  Kasia frowned, pausing as she stooped to pick up her clothes. “What do you mean, for now? Surely you don’t intend to ask for more?”

  “As long as I am happy, I will keep your secret. Otherwise I will go straight to the Lord Commander and tell him how you attempted to seduce me by stripping.” Wojciek growled.

  Kasia’s eyes widened in horror. What the fuck had she just gotten herself into? Her eyes narrowed to a glare, “Do you really think my father would believe I would attempt to seduce you? What’s to stop me from telling him what you asked me to do in exchange for your silence?”

  A cruel smile grew across Wojciek’s face. “Do you think he would believe you over me? I am his second on the battlefield, his will off the battlefield. You are his little girl who has been sneaking around and whoring herself out for months. I’m sure it would be no problem to get the truth out of the inn-keepers about where you were tonight. His rebellious daughter trying to frame me? He’d never believe you!”

  Kasia nodded, her mind reeling as it scrambled to think of a way out of this. For now, she needed him to believe he’d won. “You’re right. Very well.”

  She dressed without another word and left his rooms as quickly as she could—and went straight to her father.

  She found him in the war room pouring over maps and planning patrols, while issuing orders to those in attendance. “Tatu?–I-ah- I mean, Lord Commander. May I please speak with you?”

  “I’m busy, is it urgent?”

  “It will only take a few moments. I-there are a few things I need to inform you of. Please.” Technically this wasn’t urgent, but she needed to speak with him before Wojciek realized that she intended to subvert his blackmail by coming clean first. And in order for that to work, she had to be the first one to talk to him. If Wojciek spoke to her father first, nothing she said would be believed anymore.

  The Lord Commander stood straight and she realized then just how big he was. Or did he just seem bigger because of what she was about to tell him?

  “Very well, speak.”

  Kasia chewed her lip, not meeting the eyes of anyone else in the room. “Could this conversation be private?”

  Her father studied her face carefully, then addressed his knights, “Clear the room. Go gather the materials.”

  It didn’t take long for the room to clear. The Lord Commander was held in very high regard among the hunters. Every scar he bore was a creature that he had slain, a comrade in arms that he had saved.

  “Are we speaking as father and daughter then?”

  Kasia hung her head, “Unfortunately, this information is pertinent to both the Lord Commander and my Ojciec.” She took a deep breath, folding her hands together, staring down at them, unable to look her father in the eye.

  “For the past several months…I have been sneaking out after curfew to see Isaak.” Her eyes flooded with tears at this admission. What would her father do to her?

  “Wojciek caught me returning this morning. He was going to turn me in, but I begged him not to, and he agreed if…if I would let him see my body. I did.” Her head hung even lower, hot tears of shame dribbling down her cheeks, “But then he said….he said I had to keep him happy or he would tell you everything– and that if I tried to tell you the truth, he would tell you I seduced him! And that you would never believe me because I’ve been lying and sneaking out all this time. I… I am sorry Tatu?! I-” she didn’t know what to say. She didn’t regret her time with Isaak. She’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. “I know I must face punishment now.” Kasia buried her face in her hands and began to cry. “Please don’t hate me, Tatu?.”

  Her father looked down at her, his face a flat void of emotion. "Go to your room. We will discuss this later. Do not leave until I come to see you. Is that understood?"

  Kasia nodded, her heart was a lead ball that had dropped into her stomach. She wished it would weigh her down enough that she could sink into the earth and cease to exist. "Yes, Tatu?."

  Her father turned and left the room without another word. Hanging her head in shame, Kasia obediently returned to her quarters, feeling like the worst daughter in the world.

  After ten to fifteen minutes had passed, Kasia heard noise outside her door. She rose and opened the door, expecting to see her father. Andrew and Janine were standing to either side. Andrew gave her an apologetic look. "Sorry. We're supposed to stand guard."

  Kasia bit her lip, nodding. It made sense.

  Janine looked at her with wide eyes, "I've never seen your father so angry. What did you do?"

  Kasia began to cry again and told her two best friends what had happened.

  Janine threw Andrew an apologetic look. "He never said we had to guard her from outside the room." And she rushed to pull Kasia into her arms. Andrew closed the door behind them, leaving the two girls in privacy.

  Janine guided Kasia over to her bed, sat down and held her, rocking Kasia as she wept.

  Jon POV

  Jon arrived at his daughter’s room an hour later. He was unsurprised to find Andrew by himself outside the door. The boy blanched when he saw the look on his face.

  “They’re inside.” he squeaked.

  Jon nodded, pushing past the young man to enter his daughter’s room. Janine was holding his weeping daughter in her arms. Janine spotted him first, and nodded to him in deference. She kissed Kasia’s hair, whispered something to her, and excused herself.

  Jon walked forward and sat on the bed, his enormous form taking up almost the entire space. He scooped his teary eyed daughter into his lap, and held her. The affectionate gesture only seemed to make her cry harder and she wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shoulder.

  “I’m sorry, Tatu?. I’m so sorry.” she sobbed.

  Jon held his daughter, saying nothing, until her cries had calmed and breathing had steadied.

  “What has possessed you these last few months?” He asked finally. “Sleeping with a man you barely know? Risking the future you’ve worked so hard for? You’re not even married– why would he take care of you if something happened? Don’t get me wrong, the idea of a future with you fighting monsters is not my favorite, but sneaking off into the village? Running away from your guard that's there to protect you? And why— why would you debase yourself in front of Wojciek?!” he asked.

  “I… I’m sorry. I… I’ve never felt this way about someone before…he’s all I can think about. I know it was stupid.” She sniffled, wiping her nose, “But we haven't had s-sex. We just kiss and touch each other a bit.. And talk.” she struggled to say the words, but managed to force it out.

  "When Wojciek caught me, he asked if I would rather be punished by him, and he wouldn't tell you how I disobeyed you…that he would punish me instead. I thought… I thought he just wanted to humiliate me a bit– make me scrub his floors by hand or wash his laundry, something to soothe his ego.

  "Instead, he asked to see me. He promised he wouldn’t touch me… and so I didn’t think it was that unreasonable. I thought just one more secret, and this would all be over— I would follow the rules after that and it would just be this small mistake.

  "But when he said he would continue expecting me to pay for his silence… I was afraid that he would ask…” She didn't finish the sentence, continuing to lean against her father's chest.

  “I’m sorry I disobeyed you. I cannot tell you how stupid I feel. I am not telling you this to get Wojciek in trouble. You don’t even have to tell him what I told you. I just wanted to be able to say no if he ever asked for something again, knowing he had nothing left to hold over me.”

  “I don’t want you to see this woodsman anymore.”

  Kasia's head snapped up, “But Tatu? that’s not fair! We didn’t have sex! Other than sneaking out— which I won’t do again, I haven’t done anything wrong!”

  “He will take and take from you córka, until he gets what he wants. He might be willing to wait now, but no man will wait forever.”

  “So I am not allowed to court or have friends?!”

  “You have friends.”

  Kasia glowered at him.

  “You are the living proof of what happens from courting. You think I wanted your mother to stop at kissing?” Jon smirked at her, “Believe it or not, I was quite the catch. Probably more handsome than this woodsman of yours.”

  Kassia made a retching sound.

  Jon laughed and squeezed her to his chest, then released her. “Now get dressed in your armor. There’s a meeting in the throne room and everyone must attend.”

  As Jon left his daughter to ready herself, closing the door behind him, he turned to Andrew and said very carefully, “I have forbidden my daughter from seeing the woodsman again.”

  “Yes sir, Lord Commander. She will never see him again, Janie and I will see to it.”

  Jon stared at Andrew, raising his eyebrow.

  Andrew stared back confused.

  Jon sighed. “I know how rebellious young women can be. I expect my daughter to be better than that. If anyone sees them together…” He continued staring until understanding finally dawned on Andrew’s face.

  “Oh! Right, sir. I will be sure to… uh… warn her of—” Andrew looked like he was thinking very hard, “---uh, how it would look if she was spotted disobeying you.”

  Jon gave a half smile and shook his head, “See that you do. My daughter's safety and happiness is the most important thing to me.”

  Kasia arrived at the throne room with Andrew and Janine. They joined the assembled crowd and took their places by the other initiates. She struggled to see, but when she finally did, she could see Wojciek in chains and on his knees.

  “Kurwa!” she hissed, drawing several curious glares. Dammit Tatu?! Why?! This wasn’t necessary! Now everyone in the castle will hate me and blame me for whatever you do to Wojciek! You couldn’t just yell at him in private?!

  Kasia tried to run back out of the room, but two guards stopped and held her.

  “Dammit! Let me go! I need to speak to my Ojciec!”

  Andrew and Janine came up behind her and took her arms and pulled her back into place.

  “Seriously?!” Kassia cried, “You too?!”

  “Just watch.” Andrew growled at her. “You may be the Lord Commander’s daughter, but you are still an initiate. Stay here with us.”

  “But he’s not going to treat this like the Lord Commander– he’s going to treat this like a father whose daughter got hurt!” Kassia hissed, desperately pleading with them. But it was too late. The door on the other side of the room opened and her father walked in, tall and imposing, his expression like stone.

  “Fuuuuuuckkkkk….” Kasia groaned,resigning herself to watch the shit show that was about to go down.

  She looked at her father— no, in his current attire it could only be the Lord Commander, entering the room. He had donned the heaviest plate found in the armory. It had been smithed specifically for him and fit better than his own skin. It had intricate designs embossed throughout, embellished with gold leaf. It was a sight to behold and stronger than the castle walls.

  Kasia had only ever seen him wear it for ceremonies. He held his helm under his arm and carried his size and a half claymore in his other hand. His gryphon skin cloak flowed behind him as he walked until he came to the center of the room, face to face with Wojciek.

  “Brothers!” He paused for several moments, letting the word echo through the cavernous great hall. “For we are brothers! Look around you, the faces standing beside you! DO THEM NO HARM! Think of your brothers in the field, those who protect this castle and those around the world! PROTECT THEM WITH YOUR LIFE! We are the Knight Hunters! We hunt monsters!” Jon Najberg’s voice roared through the halls.

  “Pick him up!"

  Knights, who had been standing back with the rest of the assembled, stepped forward, surrounding Wojciek and lifted him to his feet.

  “Today we found a monster among our own!”

  The Lord Commander placed his helm on his head. It was no longer her father's face, but the iron mask of one of the legendary hunters. “You are not one of us!”

  He reached out with a giant gauntlet and grabbed the emblems of their order and Wojciek’s rank, tearing them from the fallen knights' cloak. The cockatrice skin cloak fell to the ground. The guards removed Wojciek's breastplate next. They held it up so that the gathered hunters could see the insignias of honor stamped on it. They placed it on the ground and the Lord Commander raised his claymore above his head with a single arm—-a ridiculous feat of strength to remind the assembled knights who he was. He brought the sword down, the blade connected with the ground, shattering the breastplate as easily as if it had been made of porcelain.

  “Give him his blade!”

  A hunter that had been standing nearby came forward and handed Wojciek the only personal item that he would be allowed to keep. “Return with the head of the werewolf, or not at all! Begone filth!”

  Wojciek glared hatefully at the Lord Commander before finally turning and walking through the aisle made by the crowd. As he walked by, knights around him began stamping their feet in a resounding drum. Not a single soul would look at him. As he passed Kasia, watching him from the back, he spat in her direction. Finally, he left through the heavy double doors at the entrance to the chamber. The two guards posted at the back turned and followed him, spears at the ready.

  After it was over and people began to disperse, Kasia made a beeline straight for her father’s private chambers. She waited inside them, pacing angrily. It ended up being a very long time, and she was forced to give up her pacing to sit on his bed and sulk.

  When the Lord Commander finally entered, an hour or so later, upon seeing her he growled, “Go to bed.”

  Kasia stood and ran to him, “You didn’t have to do that, Tatu?! This was my fault! My sin! And now everyone knows that I’m some fragile piece of glass that should be tiptoed around and handled with silk gloves!”

  “You were not mentioned. I have told no one of what transpired. You may have been naive and stupid but he committed crimes akin to treason. You will not change my mind!”

  Kasia let out a frustrated huff, guilt curdling her stomach. “He’s going to die and it’s my fault!” Her voice was broken. Barely above a whisper.

  “He is going to die by his own choices. Had I not been Lord Commander I would have killed him myself. And if I find out that this woodsman has treated you in the same manner, then I will flay his hide to hang on this very wall.” He growled. Then in a much softer tone he added, “Go to bed maleńka (little one). Get rest.”

  “May I stay here tonight, please? I need my Tatu?.” Kasia began to break down from all of the emotions churning inside her: anger, shame, frustration, guilt.

  Her father stepped forward and pulled her into a strong embrace. She imagined, not for the first time, that it was what being hugged by a bear would feel like.

  “I cannot excuse you if you’re late to training.”

  After a few minutes of silence she started to relax as the exhaustion of the day weighed down on her, reminding her of how tired she was. Her father led her over to the bed and tucked her in.

  “Do you know that I love you, Kasia?”

  Kasia smiled sleepily at her father. “Yes. I love you too, Tatu?.”

  He nodded, his grey eyes tender as he looked at her. “I love you so much córka. Nothing you do will ever change that.”

  Her father leaned down and kissed her forehead. He put out all the candles near the bed and took a single one over to the table on the other side of the room. He still had some work to do.

  Kasia closed her eyes. She knew it would be hours before he came to bed–if he came at all. But just resting in the same room as him, knowing he would protect her from everything, filled her with a peace she couldn't find anywhere else.